I went to a hypnotist once. Well, it was me and about 150 other people in the grand ball room at a Colorado Springs Marriott Hotel. My best friend Jennifer and I decided in all our 17-year old wisdom to attend a local hypnosis conference to try and lose the extra layers of flubber lining our thighs and stomachs. The ad had said, “LOSE WEIGHT NOW. NO CALORIE COUNTING! NO STRESSFUL EXERCISE! Just 49.95!” So we said, “Sure!”
We arrived at the hotel just in time to register and watch the hordes (or at least due to the shear size of some attendees, it seemed like hordes!) of fellow fatties* circle the snack table tastefully located next to enthusiastic sales people peddling take home hypno-packs. Finally the star of the evening, our wonderful hypnotist host, took the stage and we found ourselves sitting on the floor next to the stage due to the sell-out crowd. Jenn and I sat, and listened, “Close your eyes, let the sound of my voice take you deeper. You’re getting sleepy…. Now I want you to think about all the fattening things you love to eat…telling them they have no power over you any longer….”
This went on for a good half-hour or so, and then it was the obligatory sales pitch for all the ‘Change Your Life with Hypnosis’ programs the guy had recorded and mass-produced. When the presentation was over, I felt no different, but still felt compelled to purchase the take home package for only 24.99! We left, and I put on my headphones every night before falling asleep for the next couple weeks so the last thing I heard every night was “Just say no….” I stopped listening to the tapes after realizing I had lost nothing but a good 75 dollars buying into the promises of what I could consider a madman.
Although ten years later I sit here, still overweight and disbelieving, perhaps I looked at this all wrong. For so long I thought maybe I just wasn’t someone who was sensitive to hypnosis, but perhaps I was. Perhaps I was hypnotized just long enough to be conned out of my hard-earned babysitting money! Oh well, lesson learned.
*Disclaimer: Being that I am overweight myself, I am in no way expressing any prejudice towards larger people!
