Why would one feel compelled to hold back the natural expression of an emotion?
There are many reasons we cry; sometimes we are so happy we cry tears of joy, other times we are so sad we cry tears of pain and mourning. Then we must not forget those tears that well up in our eyes out of empathy, or longing. In fact we can even break down in tears through sheer frustration.
Society has felt compelled to teach us, especially the male half of our society, that tears and crying are less than honorable, or desirable and tend to make us weak. I would have to disagree.
I could no more hold back my tears, than I can that full bellied laugh I exude when I am highly amused or entertained, or the sincere and heartfelt smile I exhibit when I greet an old friend, see a baby, talk to an elderly person about days gone by, or any of the other beautiful experiences in life and love that bring joy and warmth into my life.
I could no better hold back tears, than I could the frustration I can feel when I am frustrated, or the anger that can surface when I see an injustice in our world. I find it amusing to say the least, that we would accept anger in men, but not tears, tears in women but not anger. The world around us illicits certain feelings and their rightful expression of those feelings should be highly encouraged, not discouraged.
It is my heartfelt belief, that if we would feel more comfortable expressing the contents of our hearts and minds freely and properly in a safe and nurturing environment, then the over use of depression and anti-anxiety medications, would slowly become non-existent.
I was raised in a home, as I am sure many of my generation were, where the expression of emotion or affection of any kind was highly discouraged and frowned upon. I am a highly affectionate and intensely feeling individual who felt lost within that environment.
By the time I was in my teens I was struggling with emotions screaming to be released and when they were withheld they caused feelings of sadness and despair. It was not until my twenties did I learn to truly express my emotions outwardly. In doing so, there remained nothing repressed that could cause anxiety or depression and my life became so much healthier and happier.
It is not always the most comfortable thing to do. Our early training in life always seems to lurk somewhere in the shadows no matter how hard we work at removing it. However, the benefits reaped by expressing those emotions physically or through the written word, are priceless.
Is it better to cry or hold back feelings? Cry…sob…….blow your nose until it’s red if need be, but do not repress your feelings, it is not healthy and it will kill you from the inside out!
