Eternal Sunshine
What would you do to go back, back to a time when everything was seemingly right in your world? You hadn’t said this or done that. You had things in order, the order that you needed them to be.
To be clear. To know that you don’t know anything that is going to hurt you every second of the day. That old love never existed. You can’t still smell them when you breathe in. Their smile doesn’t light up your day even when they aren’t near. Nothing about anything can keep your mind focused on them because you don’t remember them. Eternal sunshine of a spotless mind. If only it were possible.
It couldn’t fix everything. Other people would still remember all our mistakes and short comings. No one can escape when they’ve already walked a path that has come to an end. There will never be a way to erase all our pain; we just have to figure out how to go forward the best that we can.
Losing hope means that we’ve given up for a moment. It doesn’t have to stay that way. If you can dig inside of yourself and find the courage to keep pushing on, hope will come back to you once again. The light that has been taken from you either by your hands or by other circumstances will eventually make its presence once again.
It all sounds easy. Just hang in there and keep going on. It’ll all work outbut it doesn’t. Each day is supposed to get a little easier, but it hasn’t yet. The days keep getting harder because each day is another reminder that it’s gone and it gets further away as each minute passes.
We can dream that there is a way to wipe out everything in our memory that hurts us, but truth of the matter isif we change anything, would we still be who we are today? You can’t say for sure. No one can. As bad as it hurts remembering how they smell, remembering how their eyes change when they smilewould you really want to forget that? Is it worth ending the pain to forget the happiness that was there?
Mistakes will always be made, they’re part of life. Some are easily forgiven while others take time, or are too damaging to ever be forgiven. Sometimes what we add to another person’s life is worth the risk of trying to move forward, sometimes it’s better to walk away. Either way, there is no great escape or easy way around matters of the heart.
I’d never want to wipe out one moment that I had because I wouldn’t be the same not knowing the greatness that was wrapped up in just that one person. I wouldn’t know that it was ok to break down walls that had never been touched before. Though your heart may get broken along the way, the pieces only give you more heart to give even if it’s not wanted.
