Letting go is the hardest thing you can do but it can be the most rewarding. If you love someone deeply then you have to set them free to live a happy life. If you love someone then you only want what’s best for them , not you. I had that problem not too long ago. I loved someone deeply and passionately but she had a different life plan than I did . Some relationships are just not meant to be. I had to break the ties with her and it hurt me deeply, but it had to be done. In life and relationships you have to have some goals together as well as your own goals. Relationships are a give-and-take situation and if you are’t both prepared to share ideas, and ideals, then it will soon become one-sided , and a one-sided relationship will not work in todays world.
She was young and just out of university and had a good career ahead of her and I am a professional musician. She needed the life that was more stable and didn’t keep her mate traveling 6 months out of the year. She was going to go into Homeland Security and would either get a job in New York City or Moscow. Being she was bi-lingual and Russian, it was going to be Moscow over New York City. I had no problem living in Moscow but it would cause some problems if we were married because I’d have to file a lot of documents to be able to come and go to Russia as I wanted to.
She also wanted children and a 9-5 man, and that just wasn’t me. I’m a musician and I record music and I am gone from home a lot so we discussed it and decided to break it off. That was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. I loved her and she loved me but we knew it wouldn’t work. We are still friends now but I have moved on and I am soon to be married to another lady.
I traveled to Russia right after we broke it off and she and I still talked while I was there. What was sad is she got refused both jobs , the one in New York and the one in Moscow because of her lack of experience. By this time I had already found a new lady and we were becoming serious so it was no turning back for me. She is still single after 9 months because she is torn up over the decision but I am happy as I have ever been. I loved her and I still love her , I am just not in love with her. I will carry on with my marriage and hope all goes well for my ex but she is still tortured every day over the decision.
When I think of the saying , “If you love something set it free. If it comes back it was yours …. but if it doesn’t , it never was”, I think about her. Now I add this to the saying , ” And if it does come back, make sure it is still what you want.”
