Its funny how often we get angry about things in our lives. We get angry when gas prices hit four dollars a gallon, we get angry when our favorite sports teams lose, and we get angry when we get stuck behind the guy in traffic for doing the speed limit on the expressway. Think about that, we get angry for people merely following the law!
When you really stop to think about it, most of the stuff that we allow ourselves to get upset about isn’t really anything to get upset about in the first place. So what if gas is four dollars a gallon? Drive less, or just suck it up, and not go out so much. Unfortunately, the US was built on driving forever, and not having to worry about the cost. Sadder still, we have people in this country who continue to believe it is there god given right to keep driving SUV’s even when we know how precious a commodity such as oil is these days.
As much as I might like to think that Rian Lindell is an idiot for missing three field goals, and costing the Bills two out of the last three games, does it really matter? Does it really impact our lives so much? Sure, sports fans do invest a lot of themselves into the teams they root for, but at the heart of it it is only a game. Nothing to get upset about, just entertainment on Sunday afternoons.
OK, so whats my point? My point is that to be able to control anger, we have to be able to figure out what is making us so angry about the situation that we are in. Chances are that when we get stuck behind the driver doing the speed limit, we aren’t really mad at him, but the fact that because we left late, or the fact that the gas tank is on empty, we need to get going in a hurry. We aren’t really mad at the other person, but upset because for some reason we are in an urgent situation that needs to be resolved quickly.
So, instead of getting angry, just relax, realize there isn’t a whole lot you can do at the moment, and figure out how to solve the problem. On the road, the simple answer is to just change lanes, and go around the slower driver. If you have somewhere to be in five minutes just call to wherever you have to go, and tell them you will be late. Chances are others are going to be late as well, and you won’t be as big an idiot you thought you would be for being late. Even if you have to get to a class or something like that, again you probably still have some leeway in terms of being right on time.
Sometimes at work, we find ourselves really angry at our co-workers, bosses, or maybe the irate customer that really messed up your afternoon. What then?
Again, just relax, analyze the situation, and go from there. Chances are that the customer has just had a bad day, or maybe just is in a hurry like you were on the road earlier. It probably isn’t personal that they are taking their frustrations out on you, and as such it isn’t really going to do a good deal to worry about it. If your boss is upset at you, chances are too that they are having a bad day, maybe their boss just chewed them out? Same with co-workers, maybe they just ran into the boss too, or maybe they only got two hours of sleep, and are just cranky because they are tired.
Honestly, it isn’t worth getting upset at most of the things we worry about. Too much stress isn’t healthy, and from what I have read, most experts agree that one of the keys for living longer is to not worry about the small stuff. I would say that next time Rian Lindell misses a field goal that he will not to get too upset. I think it would be rude (and kinda funny) if he came to my job, and starting chewing me out. We just need to worry about what we can control, and let the rest go.
