Overview
Seeing a friend or family member at an unhealthy weight is concerning. Obesity raises a person’s risk of developing hypertension, diabetes mellitus, cardiovascular problems and some cancers. It leads to problems such as sleep apnea, gastroesophageal reflux, infertility and osteoarthritis. With the possibility of all these health problems due to excess weight, you want to help your friend or family member get healthy–but you have to be very careful about your approach if you decide to tell someone they need to lose weight.
Step 1
Be gentle. You don’t want to seem hurtful or mean. According to Martin Binks, Ph.D., Director of Behavioral Health and Research at Duke Diet and Fitness Center, you need to be gentle in your approach due to the sensitivity of the subject of weight.
Step 2
Use health as your reasoning. Tina Tessina, Ph.D., psychotherapist and author of “How to Be Free and Still Be a Couple,” believes that taking the approach of wanting better health for your loved one works best. Explain you want him to be happy and healthy and live a long life, and that you feel his weight could get in the way of those things.
Step 3
Avoid using loaded words. Fat is a highly-charged and insulting word when discussing weight. Using words with negative connotations or any criticisms will cause anger and resentment. You want to help, not hurt her feelings.
Step 4
Get involved. Starting a diet and exercise program is easier when someone else joins you. Offer to be a workout partner and give plenty of encouragement to keep her going. Don’t compare numbers when it comes to weight, just give plenty of support when she makes progress.
Step 5
Encourage healthy choices. If you share a home with your loved one, get rid of all your unhealthy food. Having junk food around means he’s always trying to battle temptation, and willpower only goes so far. Eventually he’ll cave in and experience a setback in his weight loss goals.
Step 6
Let her make her own decisions. If you’re constantly policing what she eats, she’s going to resent you. The same goes for nagging about exercise. If you tell her she’s not doing enough, she’s not going to listen to you anymore.
About this Author
Katie Duzan is an accomplished writer who lives in Cary, N.C. She has been a writer since 2006. She has published a variety of articles on websites such as eHow, LIVESTRONG and Overstock.com. Duzan holds a Bachelor of Science in business administration and computer information systems from the University of Arkansas.
