Approach anxiety is the fear to walk up to someone and begin a conversation. It creates feelings of insecurity and nervousness. Approach anxiety is a struggle that both men and women have whether they are trying to talk to a new friend, a professor or most often somebody they may be interested in dating. Learning how to overcome approach anxiety can make meeting people a lot more relaxing and fun.
Breathe
Taking deep breaths before entering a new social setting and approaching someone can help you relax and learn to feel more calm. It’s common to lose site of how important breathing is and how helpful it can be when nerves take over. Breath in and out slowly several times prior to your approach. Deep breathing can help you feel more settled and prepared for what you may consider an anxiety-ridden moment.
Bring Support
Listen to a support system. If you are entering a new setting and know that you have anxiety about meeting new people, take a family member or a friend with you. Your support system should prep you by reminding you that you are a strong and capable person. Listen to them and take in their positive feedback so you can alleviate your fears while you are in a social situation. Let their words help you become empowered and reinforce your ability to follow through with your goals.
Come Prepared
Before you approach someone, be prepared. Make a list of questions before you are out and about of what you may want to ask this new friend or potential romantic interest. Figure out what you want to know about people beforehand so you can have a more free and open dialogue with fewer awkward silences.
Practice
Practice your techniques on a friend. Go through your list of questions and have your friend role-play with you potential answers to what you will ask. Do this several times and get a feel for what you will say and how the conversation may go. Practice helps and when you are in the actual situation the discussion will have a better flow.
Self talk
Your ways of thinking are important. Before you go out make a list of positive thoughts that motivate you along with some of your own positive traits. Once you are in the social setting remind yourself of these thoughts. When you start thinking negatively, redirect to the positive traits that you listed and allow yourself to feel confident in your approach. Use these tools and remember to have reasonable expectations. According to social anxiety resources.com, “when you change your own expectation that you should be perfect, you can better understand that others will not condemn you for making mistakes.”
