I came within a hair’s breadth of writing for the other side. As is often the case with the questions posed by Helium, this is a matter of interpretation. On first sight, my inkling was to say no. My original…
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February 27, 2015 Communication
I can think of a number of occasions where telling a lie is, not only okay, but actually beneficial to the recipient of the lie. I think it is difficult to set moral imperatives on oneself, anyway. I will always…
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When dealing with this subject, it is good to get some things defined. I think there is a big difference between being alone and feeling lonely. Then, there is isolaton. Spending time alone, at least for some people, is a…
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February 11, 2015 Friends and Peers
There are some who feel people use the term “love” too loosely. This could be true, if you have a very strict, narrow view of the meaning of love. However, love can mean a lot of things to a lot…
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January 24, 2015 Crisis Support
Usually, I take a stance that it’s dangerous to speak in imperatives. Never do this or always do that are generally not a part of my vocabulary. I’ve been touched by suicide in my life and I know how devastating…
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Let’s put it this way, if you can’t trust at least one someone 100%, you’re going to have a long and lonely life. I can hear some people out there, now. “But, I’ve been burned before.” Yeah? Well, so have…
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There are a number of reasons we choose to agree verbally, even though we really want to say “no.” Probably the most notable reason is we don’t want to hurt the other person’s feelings. It could be said that that’s…
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December 4, 2014 Communication
One of my favorite “Seinfeld” moments is when Jerry is called by a telemarketer. He tells the guy he’s busy, but if the marketer gives him his (the salesman’s) home phone number, Jerry will call back. The marketer says he can’t…
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December 4, 2014 Communication
A lot of people will tell you that this is a good idea and it’s the kind of thing you might see on a TV sit-com where a character will tell another, “You need to tell her (him) about your…
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December 4, 2014 Communication
Okay, let’s say you’re in a relationship and it’s the kind of relationship you want to continue forever. Sure, there are going to be some potholes in the road, but you want to do what you can to keep things…
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November 28, 2014 Friends and Peers
This is a very tricky and delicate situation. Again, it becomes necessary to take issue with helium’s choice of wording on a question. I would probably re-word the question as: “Is it okay for ex-lovers to be friends?” I’m under…
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October 23, 2014 Communication
While using the word “ruining” may be a bit of overkill, there can be no doubt that this style of communication is overstepping its bounds. Using text message style and its cute little shortcuts is fine-for text messaging. As soon…
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October 17, 2014 Friends and Peers
Like most things with the internet, there can be some good and some bad. With the internet, there is a wealth of intformation available at your fingertips. This is good. Unfortunately, a lot of “information” on the internet is less…
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October 16, 2014 Friends and Peers
I know, after reading some of the other pieces, that I’m in the minority here, but I really can’t see a reason for drama in a friendship. It’s a little different if you’re still a teenager, or something like that. Teens…
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This is another one of those helium questions that could easily be answered either way. I was surprised to read that the answer was so overwhelmingly no, according to the polls. I suppose people want to feel good about human…
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There comes a time in life when we all have to let go. The kids have to allow the apron strings to be cut, but the parents (moms especially) have to actually cut the strings. When two adult siblings have…
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This is another helium question which could be answered either way. As I am wont to do, I am looking at the wording of the question verbatim and responding appropriately. If the question read: “Are parents FULLY responsible…” I would…
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When I think of judgmental family members, I immediately think of mom. Not just my mom, though she can be judgmental, but I mean the archetypal “MOM.” Something happens to a woman when she becomes a mother. She can’t help…
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Kids should have to worry about the following things: Do I have someone to play with? Can I get my homework done? As they get older, they may turn to more grave matters such as: Is it obvious I’m getting…
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I’m of a mind that we have too many people trying to teach us how to live-and charging us a pretty penny in the process. We have life coaches, pre-marital couples counseling and, now, couples communication classes. I suppose, for…
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Whether it’s okay or not, it probably happens on a daily basis. Others may choose to say it’s a bad idea or a big mistake to impose your feelings of others onto your children, and I may even agree. But,…
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I don’t have a numbered list, so I won’t present a “what not to do” in arguments with bullet points. Though I do have a degree in psychology, that isn’t going to be the basis for my advice. Like anyone,…
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May 15, 2014 Friends and Peers
To my way of thinking, any friendship that has to be “dealt with” may be a friendship that’s already in trouble. What exactly is a platonic relationship? And, why does this question fall under the sub-heading, “Friendship Drama and Issues?”…
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I do believe it’s true that, sometimes, family will take advantage of other family in an unfair way. But, to make a broad generalization and ask “why” as if this happens in every family, is a mistake. If someone has…
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April 24, 2014 Marriage and Divorce
Trust is the cornerstone to a great relationship. It is absolutely imperative in a marriage. Without trust, it is very difficult, if not impossible, for a marriage to work. How can a lack of trust affect your marriage? It can…
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Well, who said funerals were going to be fun, anyway? There are probably a number of subjects that should be avoided at any given funeral. My best guess is, the closer you are to someone, the more subjects there are…
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I really can’t believe that anyone would write for the other side, but I guess there are still eternal optimists out there. I’d take it a step further and say you can’t trust the honesty of people you’re dating in…
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This is another one that would be pretty easy to write for the other side. “All contact” can sound pretty harsh. On the other side of the same coin, so can “repeatedly disrespects.” First off, I want it clear that…
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April 3, 2014 Marriage and Divorce
It’s difficult to write to this topic and not come across as cynical. Every attempt will be made not to sound negative. While the topic is marriage not being for everyone, by contrast, it is obviously a positive thing for…
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March 26, 2014 Friends and Peers
I guess I’m confused as to what there is to understand. This “trend” has had a name for about a generation, but I think it’s always existed. Basically, “friends with benefits” are platonic friends with whom one can engage in sex,…
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