Overview
Narcissistic personality disorder has traits rather than symptoms. Because personality disorders are enduring patterns and concepts of the self–over all domains of functioning–they are identified by characteristics that are stable over time. Everyone has healthy narcissisism; otherwise it would be difficult to attain selfhood. What distinguishes a personality disorder is that it creates constant maladaptive behaviors, world views and thoughts.
All About Me
Of all the traits of narcissistic personality disorder, the one that stands out is the narcissist’s sense that everyone and everything is an extension of herself. She cannot view others as separate persons or things completely separate from herself. She expects others to treat her as entitled and to admire and love her. When her sense of superiority is threatened or exposed, she will attack or react with defensiveness and rage.
Idealization and Devaluation of Others
According to “Psychoanalytic Diagnosis,” narcissists tend to idealize or devalue others. They have a grandiose sense of themselves that creates a constant “ranking”process by which they seek solutions to issues based upon prestige more than other realistic concerns. A narcissist seeking a college for his son may make the choice based upon his perception of the prestige of the school rather than what would be the best place for his son, because his son is an extension of his own needs. In the process, he would devalue and attempt to sabotage anything good his son would say about a preferred school.
Narcissistic Envy
When a narcissist perceives herself as deficient compared to another in some way, she operates out of envy. She will likely attempt to destroy what the the other person has by criticizing, scorning or otherwise sabotaging the person. This trait is a reflection of the narcissist’s need to cover up any of her own inadequacies.
Perfectionism
Narcissists tend to expect they are equal to only the highest of ideals and may convince themselves they have attained ideals they have not. They cannot feel forgiveably human; they are perfectionists and instead internally defend against any evidence that they may be internally flawed. They use rationalizations or distort the reasons for their apparent flaws, often by making up a new–usually untrue–story they believe and then expect others to believe.
Lack of Capacity to Love
Simply put, narcissists crave and depend upon others’ admiration and love but are not capable of responding to others with deep love. Likewise, they are incapable of empathy because they cannot fathom others except through their own thoughts and emotions.
Narcissistic Attitude
According to “Disorders of Personality,” narcissistic personalities cause people to act arrogantly and disdainfully, viewing many social conventions and rules as not important for them. They tend to expect things from others without having to reciprocate, and they take others for granted.
Rationalization and Fantasy
Narcissists are deceitful to themselves. When they experience obstacles to their sense of superiority, they rationalize or create fantasies that explain their solutions to problems, and then believe what they create.
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