Women’s perceptions and negative image results in our automatic devaluing ourselves and only thinking of ourselves in terms of our sexuality and attraction to men.
What is it that makes male attention so much better than that from females? If you are happily married as I am, you should not need it. But something in our psyche seems to thrive on it. When another female treats you warmly and acts friendly it is appreciated, but not a reason for evaluating. Every male between the age of 16 and 90 gives reason to wonder if they have ulterior motives when they show you attention. I believe most females act on the assumption that they do. If they welcome the advances, they read something into them that is probably not there. If they don’t want those advances, they cause these women to feel anger and they blame these poor unsuspecting guys of wanting to get something from them.
I wonder why most of us are so needy that we feel any attention is romantic if coming from the members of the opposite sex. Women often feel empty without an admiring male in their life. Their very self-esteem is wrapped up in how men see them. It is through the eyes of men that we assess ourselves. That is so sad.
A woman tells us we are talented, wonderful, look great, the perfect parent, a great cook, a superb friend and we accept the compliments with a blush, but not much emotion. A man says we are attractive and we react with the immediate action of wishing to give him everything we have, often starting with our body. Our feelings rush out of control like a schoolgirl and we read all kinds of importance in those few short words. We think about it for a short time and assign it much emotional significance. They want us, they love us, and they will be ours forever.
We are certainly immature when it comes to emotions and relationships. Men are often thought of as the immature ones, but at least they are honest about what they feel. They seldom claim they admire your mind when they are attracted by your figure. They don’t complicate the message with too many words, or explanations. Most times they are as direct as their looks. Some men assign no emotions to the words or even the act. They are in many ways a lot more honest then women.
We must stop measuring ourselves by our sexuality, but we could make a giant step forward by actually embracing our needs. To pretend they do not exist is not the answer. We have two groups of women now, the timid ones of my generation who wait to be asked and take every comment as an outward advance and those who forge the way themselves and are the givers as well as the recipients of sexual innuendo and outward advances.
A complete woman must embrace their sexuality, but not be measured by it. How we look or whether or not we attract partners is not who we are. We are much more than connected body parts, “We Are Woman, Hear Us Roar.” A glorious mixture of sensitivities and strengths, we are a conglomerate of opposites and contrasts. Women are not made up of a straightforward formula that is predictable and constant, but an ever-changing entity where mood, and outlook, view and dreams can metamorphous growing and changing shape.
What is the path to finding a definition that sums up what we are? You know we defy description. What would it be like to see a picture that captures our essence? You know that is an illusive dream. No one has ever successfully defined a woman. Nor will they ever.